Watchdog blasts insane govt spending on things like slot-playing pigeons and zombified Russian cats

As the federal debt rockets past $30 trillion with no end in sight, a watchdog group is exposing the government for its literally out-of-control, insane spending on things like slot-playing pigeons and zombified Russian cats.

Illinois-based nonprofit American Transparency has issued a report called “Where’s The Pork?” detailing gob-smacking spending at the federal level on frivolous projects that are pushing the nation right off a cliff economically.

“The federal government isn’t just wasting your money. They are literally ripping you off,” Adam Andrzejewski, who is the group’s founder emphatically told the New York Post. “They are milking taxpayers like dairy cows.”

The Government Accountability Office issued a report in March that showed $281 billion in improper and mistaken payments in 2021. That doesn’t include billions wasted on fraudulent COVID relief programs.

“What government program is running well?” he justifiably asked.

The waste over the last two years highlighted in the report is simply dizzying. Buckle up.

Taxpayers are footing the bill to the tune of $465,339 to study gambling addiction using pigeons. The money was used to build a casino for the birds thanks to Dr. Fauci’s National Institute of Health. It was sent to leftist Reed College in Portland, Ore. Pigeons receive tokens that they “earn, accumulate, spend, or gamble” on slot machines.

Seven million dollars in the form of Paycheck Protection Program checks were sent to imaginary farms in impossible places, according to a ProPublica investigation. Beach Haven, N.J. north of Atlantic City was home to phantom agricultural operations like the Beefy King cattle ranch and the Deely Nuts tree nut farm.

Harvard blew $75,000 of federal funds on a leaf blower, a wooden, pole, and a number of Caribbean lizards. It sounds like a bad joke but The National Science Foundation mumbled something about climate change and then decided that they needed to capture 47 anole lizards in the Turks and Caicos Islands so they could blast them with leaf blowers.

(Video Credit: Nature Video)

If that wasn’t hilarious enough, how about transgendered monkeys? That little venture cost $477,121. A Florida lab took male rhesus macaques and dosed them with female hormones intent on transitioning them to the other sex. Again, Dr. Fauci’s National Institute of Allergies and Infectious Diseases was behind this nuttery in an effort to determine why male-to-female transgender humans suffer high levels of HIV infection.

How about satellites spying on cows? No problemo, for a meager $45,000 the National Science Foundation and the DigitalGlobe Foundation will grant your wish. The University of California Santa Barbara spent eight months spying on the interaction of cows and wildlife. Gives new meaning to “where’s the beef?”

The COVID relief Paycheck Protection Program doled out $14 million to big names during the pandemic, according to the New York Post. Not exactly the ones in need, but stars such as Kanye West, Robert Redford, and Francis Ford Coppola collected big bucks in 2020 from the COVID relief Paycheck Protection Program.

Then there are “zombie” Russian cats. Sounds cute, huh? Not so much. Gruesome experiments costing $549,331 were conducted in a Russian lab with Americans’ money on cats with the goal of turning them into electrically-controlled zombies. You guessed it, Dr. Fauci’s National Institutes of Health is involved again, this time in conjunction with the Pavlov Institute of Physiology in St. Petersburg, Russia. They took 18 kitties and severed their brain stems to keep them from moving while still alive. Then they used electrical charges to force the zombified cats to walk on treadmills.

The National Science Foundation spent $556,584 on animal poop to test “a mathematical model of defecation.” Footage was recorded of pandas, elephants, warthogs, and other animals taking a dump. The feces were then weighed noting size and shape. Forty-three species were used in the crappy research.

The National Security Agency put the term “intelligence” in doubt by spending $3.6 million on a never-used garage. They were unable to build a functional employee parking lot. The finished garage, meant to house 250 vehicles, held just 87. Each spot cost $34,000. The garage failed to pass a safety test and the NSA paid $500,000 to have it demolished.

Scientists from Stanford University spent almost $7 million in funds from the National Cancer Institute to build an artificially intelligent toilet system that films… well, you know what. Researchers claim your behind has up to 37 unique creases that create an individually identifiable “analprint.” The toilet’s internal cameras and computers analyze the user’s urine flow, track the time spent on the pot, and evaluate feces to gauge its owner’s overall health. The data is regularly uploaded to a secure Internet cloud.

As far as spending goes for the federal government, that’s just the tip of the Titanic’s iceberg.

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