Tucker: Fauci gets Covid, so what does this mean?

(Video: Fox News)

Following news that Chief Medical Advisor Dr. Anthony Fauci has tested positive for COVID-19, Fox News’s Tucker Carlson turned his snark up to eleven to dissect the many failures of “the man who got us through the pandemic.”

Noting the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases director’s age — he’s 81 — Carlson said, “We’re not calling Tony Fauci old, but at this point, he’s probably not buying any long-term municipal bonds. If you were his investment adviser, you’d tell him to day trade.”

“Yet,” Carlson said in his lengthy opening monologue on “Tucker Carlson Tonight” Thursday, “Tony Fauci is still working.”

“In fact, he’s one of the longest-serving employees in the entire federal government,” he continued. “He’s almost certainly the highest-paid.”

That’s how good Fauci is, Carlson said, oozing sarcasm: “The term ‘national treasure’ comes to mind.”

Carlson recalled the almost cult-like support for Dr. Fauci among “college-educated professionals with desperately unhappy personal lives” who thanked Fauci via “yard sign shrines.”

“And you can actually understand their gratitude,” Carlson said. “Fauci is the man who got us through the pandemic as the coronavirus wafted from a Chinese military bio lab in Wuhan and settled over the United States.”

“Tony Fauci was the man Americans looked to for guidance,” the Fox host stated. “He was our Sherpa, our diminutive spirit guide.”

And that spirit guide, as Carlson pointed out, is fickle, starting with his views on the efficacy of masks.


Ultimately, said Carlson, masks weren’t about health at all, and Fauci knew it.

“‘There’s no reason to be walking around with a mask,’ [Fauci] told ’60 Minutes’ in March of 2020, but that turned out to be not quite accurate,” he explained. “In fact, there was a reason to walk around in a mask, but it had nothing to do with public health. The experience of being forcibly masked was so unpleasant and so humiliating it distracted you from other questions, such as ‘Where did this virus come from anyway?'”

And, said Carlson, Fauci had plenty to gain from keeping Americans “distracted.”

“As someone who helped fund the development of COVID with your tax dollars,” he said, “Fauci was strongly in favor of you being distracted, so he soon changed the guidance. He upped it soon. Soon Fauci was demanding that we mask up, including outdoors and exercising, even alone in your care, and so we did.”

Some among us, noted Carlson, even donned two masks “one on top of the other, with no air holes to breath” at Fauci’s behest.

And the doctor didn’t stop there.

“By December of 2020, he had checked with science and concluded that actually one of the main risk factors for COVID-19 was your family’s ancient religious observances,” Carlson said. “Those are the real problem, so Tony Fauci went on NBC News to cancel Christmas.”

And still, said Carlson, Fauci persisted: “‘Going forward,’ he told us, ‘You must never shake hands with another human being. That is, if you don’t want to die drowning in your own fluids in a COVID ward.'”

Those who died over the canceled holidays “died alone because due to science, Tony Fauci prevented their loved ones from seeing them, from holding their hands in their final moments on Earth.”

And then came Fauci’s Big Pharma push.

“The entire country was going to have to get the COVID shot, every one of us and anyone who refused would be crushed, yelled at, ostracized, fired,” Carlson said.

“When people are vaccinated,” said Fauci, “they can feel safe, that they are not going to get infected.”

“Natural immunity was a joke compared to the COVID vaccine,” Carlson said.

With the boosters, Fauci declared, we “can do better than nature. That’s why this is a pandemic of the unvaccinated.”

But of course — and this was Carlson’s point — none of those restrictions or shots actually stopped people from contracting COVID.

“Dr. Fauci is COVID positive, despite double masking outside, despite skipping Christmas, despite his strict regimen of celibacy and no handshaking, despite four separate COVID vaccine shots,” Carlson said. “Dr. Fauci got sick anyway.”


“Now, this seems like an important moment,” Carlson stated. “What does it mean?”

According to a message delivered Thursday from the now-infected Fauci, it means more jabs.

“This virus is changing and we need to keep up with it,” Fauci said. “In order to do that, we’ve got to do better with new vaccine platforms such as nanoparticle vaccines. We cannot proceed with that unless we get additional funding.”

In fact, Fauci admitted, the untested, experimental vaccines that a huge number of Americans — including pilots, nurses, teachers, and members of our military — were forced to submit to in order to preserve their livelihoods and careers, were not going to stop COVID.

“Importantly,” Fauci said, “we need to both prevent infection and transmission. We know that we cannot do that unless we get a highly effective mucosal or intranasal vaccine.”

Meanwhile, Carlson pointed out, no one seems to know how many people have been injured by the mandated vaccines.

“Is anyone even keeping track?” he asked.

Side-effects aside, Fauci “doubled down, pressing for the mass vaccination of all American children over five,” Carlson said.

Carlson played a clip of Senator Rand Paul (R-Ky.) — who is, in fact, a medical doctor — in which Paul notes to Fauci and the American people that there “are no studies” that show “a reduction in hospitalization or death for children who take a booster.”

And, said Paul, “Americans should all know this, there are no studies on children showing a reduction in hospitalization or death with taking a booster.”

Fauci dismissed Paul’s point as “absurd.”

“That’s how a scientist talks,” Carlson explained. “Questions about efficacy, whether the drugs you prescribe actually work, mean nothing compared to questions about federal funding. Federal funding is what matters to a scientist.”

“In fact, federal funding was the whole point of Fauci’s testimony today,” he said. “He was there to let Congress know that as a man who’s been vaccinated four times and still got COVID, he can tell you firsthand, we’re never going to beat COVID without more vaccines and to get that vaccine, we’re going to send billions more tax dollars to Tony Fauci.”

“There’s no way around it,” Carlson quipped. “It’s science.”

Even Fauci, when pressed by Paul, had to admit that he doesn’t “know as a fact” that he does not receive royalty payments from “any entity that [Fauci] ever oversaw the distribution of money in research grants.”

In other words, it would appear that Fauci is personally profiting off the vaccines he is pushing every American to take.

In the end, Carlson said that “as his fans” we all hope that Fauci is getting rich off the vaccines, and that, as new ones are developed for us, the vaccine makers will receive “another dose of legal immunity in the extremely unlikely event their experimental drugs were to kill thousands more Americans whose deaths are then covered up and forgotten.”

Carlson was sure Americans would be “thrilled” by news of more federal funding and new vaccines.

“We reached out to Justin Bieber tonight for comment,” he said, “but unfortunately, his face is paralyzed, so he couldn’t respond.”


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