Politics

Mockery ensues as Alyssa Milano laments Texas allowing just 6 sex toys: ‘Supposed to rest on Sunday’

September 5, 2021 | | Print Article

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Far-left Hollywood actress Alyssa Milano raised eyebrows last week when she complained on Twitter that Texas allegedly boasts a law forbidding women from owning more than six dildos …

A dildo is a female sex toy shaped like a penis, FYI.

Apparently, besides being “super-sciency,” the Hollywood actress is also super freaky.

“Just a reminder, there’s a law in Texas that prohibits a woman from owning more than 6 dildos. But you can own as many guns as you want,” she tweeted last Thursday.

Look:

She even shared a video version of her bizarre message.

Watch:

The tweets raised a number of questions, the most prominent of them being why in the heck would any woman on Earth need SIX dildos.  Even the zealously pro-abortion Satanic Temple would likely have difficulty answering this question!

Folks also wondered how many Milano owns. Considering the passion she displayed in her tweet, it’s presumed she owns at least six.

“How many holes do you have that you need more than 6?” one Twitter user asked.

Well, it’s presumed she definitely has at least one giant hole where her brain’s supposed to be. After all, her claim wasn’t even factually accurate.

Passed in 1973, Texas’ obscenity statute says that it’s a crime if someone “possesses six or more obscene devices or identical or similar obscene articles.”

The statute further defines an “obscene device” as “a device including a dildo or artificial vagina, designed or marketed as useful primarily for the stimulation of human genital organs.”

In other words, the statute also pertains to male sex toys. But leave it to Milano, an avid third-wave feminist, to try to make some point about alleged sexism that doesn’t actually exist.

But there’s more.

Law enforcement officials in Texas don’t even appear to be enforcing this antiquated rule.

Two years ago, Houston station KHOU ran a story about some of the state’s bizarre laws, including this one. In response, the Fort Bend County Sheriff’s Office posted a tweet ensuring the state’s freaks that it’s “not actively enforcing this law.”

Look:

Indeed, a Google, Bing and DuckDuckGo search brought up zero stories about Texans being arrested for owning too many sex toys.

And then there’s also the fact that enforcing such a ban would be near impossible because dildo sales aren’t strictly tracked like gun sales, despite the ownership of sex toys not being a constitutional right.

It appears, for all intents and purposes, Milano was simply trying to make a pro-gun control point that turned out to be a non-point point, as usual.

The actress has a history of making non-point points, many of them self-owns.

During the 2016 presidential election, for instance, she tweeted, “SHOW ME WHAT DEMOCRACY LOOKS LIKE!” But when folks responded by assailing her with criticism, she locked her replies so only those who followed her could reply.

In addition, many of her non-point points concern issues that have no bearing on her. The same holds true of her dildos tweet, because Milano lives in California, not Texas.

Though in fairness, one could argue that the issue is actually relevant to her since she herself is kind of a dildo, no?

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Vivek Saxena
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