The whiniest man in America, 30-year-old millennial loser Michael Rotondo, literally called the police on his own parents this week after they refused to provide him with direct access to his Legos. And no, that’s not a joke.

The tragic but admittedly hilarious incident occurred in the New York town of Camillus this Friday as Rotondo, who rose to notoriety last month after a local court ruled that he must vacate his parents’ home, was packing the last of his belongings into a station wagon.

Some of his belongings– including Legos he apparently bought for his own son — were stashed in his parents’ basement, but his parents refused him direct access, telling him that they preferred he tell them what he want and they retrieve the items for him.

This was enough to spur Rotondo into calling the cops on them. By the time the authorities arrived,  however, the Legos had already been located, according to The Post-Standard. *facepalm*

This “man” has the emotional fortitude of a 2-year-old child. The same applies to his non-existent work ethic.

“It was a lot of work to get everything packed up,” he whined to local media:

Welcome to the real world, where people WORK every single day to earn a living and make ends meet. Rotondo knows little about the real world, of course, because he’s spent all his life shacked up at his parents’ home.

That all began to change when his parents filed a petition against him, demanding a local court evict him from their home. The court obliged, and thus began Rotondo’s journey to manhood.

Camillus family in Onondaga County Supreme Court today after trying to evict 30yo son Michael Rotondo. Judge has ordered him to vacate the home, Rotondo says he's not sure where he will go. More at noon on @NewsChannel9 pic.twitter.com/pnevEQvwpj

— Farah Jadran (@FarahJadran) May 22, 2018

That journey has apparently fallen by the wayside though because of a bleeding-heart cousin and, shockingly enough, infamous conspiracy theorist Alex Jones.

Jones reportedly gave the man-child $3000 for reasons unknown, which Rotondo in turn used to rent an Airbnb for his first week away from his parents’ home.

Afterward he plans to set up shop at his cousin’s place. The cousin, who reportedly suffers from a brain injury of some kind, told the The Post-Standard that he empathizes with Rotondo’s purported struggle and hardship.

What struggle and hardship? He’s a lazy, spoiled man-child. Nothing more, nothing less. What he desperately needs isn’t a pat on the back or a handout. No, no, no. What needs is a slap of cold, hard reality.

But thanks to bleeding hearts, it doesn’t seem like Rotondo will be getting a taste of what he truly deserves anytime soon. Sad.

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Vivek Saxena

Senior Staff Writer
Vivek@bizpacreview.com

V. Saxena is a staff writer for BizPac Review with a decade of experience as a professional writer, and a lifetime of experience as an avid news junkie. He holds a degree in computer technology from Purdue University.

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