Feminists get a Jurassic kick in the a**!!

Being a feminist is like having Alzheimer’s. Every day has a surprise.

The latest utterly predictable development that has feminists swooning is the record-breaking opening weekend for “Jurassic World,” the latest hugely successful installment in the hugely successful “Jurassic Park” franchise that has been a monster hit since first taking over movie screens since 1993.

It’s got drama, it’s got romance, it’s got huge, loud, really cool and totally deadly dinosaurs in computer-generated imagery that audiences are eating up.

So, naturally ….

Of course they did.

Its hero is a man — a military veteran no less! — who acts like a man. It’s heroine is a woman who goes through a life-changing experience (in the form of several close brushes with being eaten alive by genetically engineered prehistoric creatures) and decides that life on the career track might not be the most fulfilling way of spending what days she has on earth.

Crazy huh?

It’s a DINOSAUR MOVIE! What the hell do feminists want? Norma Rae, for God’s sake?

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Fortunately for the future of the Republic, not to mention male-female relationships and the future of Match.com, normal people don’t think like feminists (and especially not that particularly odious brand of lib “thinker” known as a “male feminist.”)

Which is why Monday’s headlines read like this:

And movie watchers who — unlike feminists and Alzheimer’s patients — can remember yesterday, aren’t surprised in at all.

(Actually, those two hate sides each other. But has anyone else noticed how rarely liberals actually like each other? Really, it’s the oddest thing.)

But if the feminists hated “Jurassic World,” they might love the next installment. Check out this story pitch:

Now, that would be a surprise.

It would also be a flop.

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