‘Weed Guy’ stabs ‘Beer Guy’ in Times Square turf war

Photos by Aniket
Photos by Aniket

Times are tough in America these days. If you want to know how tough, the United Kingdom’s press offered a recent glimpse.

The Daily Mail, a British tabloid, regaled us Saturday with the tale of real-life drama playing out in the streets of New York City as rival panhandlers clashed over turf.

A panhandler, also known as “Weed Guy” because he carries a sign around Times Square that says, “I need money for weed,” used a pen Friday night to stab another panhandler, the so-called “Beer Guy,” whose sign reads, “I need beer.”

Fortunately for law enforcement, the whole sorry incident was witnessed by two men, who, despite being dressed as Alien and Predator from the science fiction horror series “Aliens vs. Predator,” turned out to be credible witnesses, Mail Online reported. Hey, this is Times Square!

The drama began when Weed Guy spit on Beer Guy, who became enraged and threatened to hit Weed Guy, who responded by pulling out a pen and stabbing Beer Guy in the face. Five times.

So much for stoners being mellow.

Police did arrest Weed Guy, aka Justin Long, while Beer Guy, aka Wayne Semancik, was treated at the scene for lacerations to his face. On a positive note, Mail Online pointed out that while Weed and Beer can’t get along, there does appear to be some kind of truce between Alien and Predator.

H/T Weasel Zippers

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